Just a couple.
Hm, interesting. I'm really curious why beheeyem society decided on exile as a punishment - do they have hangups about harming each other directly, so prefer punishments where they don't have to see the details, or is exile seen as even worse so it's a stronger disincentive, or is there the potential for people to be unexiled eventually? And I like describing the place with [The only civilized race on the planet enslaved animals to fight for them].
It doesn't seem like she's actually in that much trouble, though - you say her trip has only taken a few hours, and they're obviously aware of what happened, so they'd be able to send someone to start looking for her quite quickly. If it were a longer distance, there wouldn't be the hope of quick rescue, and long enough distance would make it so it was also unlikely they could start someone on their way immediately.
Hm. While I read the series, I never finished it, so I don't know if any of this is covered by the ending - but if he misses swimming, wouldn't dolphin or whale have been an option? And if he misses other yeerks, why doesn't he stay close to where the others are? Is staying away from each other part of allowing them to stay on Earth? And how do other people know he was a yeerk? Is there some way the government makes them identifiable, or is it just a matter of any new person who appeared being under scruitiny, or are they just not as good at acting human when they don't have a host brain to draw from?
The character himself seems nicely low-key. I like how he doesn't seem to have much of a social response to being hated, his priority is about getting hurt or killed as a result.
Ah, original-model yeerk flashback. It's nice to see things from their point of view.
Contains no actual drabbles.
A deeply appreciated note.
I love the picture you paint of how things go and wish all of this was far longer. If only she could have been the actual book's protagonist. And I love even more that this version's rebellion starts off with history's most civilized mass suicide.
Oh, this is perfect. I like how they're still so distinctly them, even with things reversed reversed so Sayaka is the experienced one and Kyouko an ordinary girl in awe of her.
Do they have any chance of finding their way to a good ending?
Next week: carapaces!